quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Randomize