You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
you never un-have a 4some
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Randomize
