The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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