I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
