The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
