bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize
