Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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