2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
