this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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