don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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