you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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