party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Randomize
