Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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