ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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