i barfeds in our rink
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
