id be glad to
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
