Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
