Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
