i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
