I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
