I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Randomize
