they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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