Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
