So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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