he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize