I wanna passion pit in your ass
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
