Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
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