i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize
