I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
he was CRYING into my vagina
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
