are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
