but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
