pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
