He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
