ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Randomize
