i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
