it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
