i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
