That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
