Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Randomize
