i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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