addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
