Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize