you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Pooping to opera.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
