If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Randomize
