New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
