Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
