Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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