no, he came in my armpit
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
