hotel room ftw
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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