I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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